Check in on your friends

I always see posts on social media that say: Stop reaching out to people first and you’ll see who really cares about you. And while I believe that communication should be a two-way street, if it isn’t, it’s also not the end of the world. Most people who suffer, suffer in silence and that friend who always thinks about reaching out but never does, may be suffering and not want anyone to know or be looking for the right moment to tell you. Check in on your friends, not for a favor or to ask them to do something with you. Check in on them to simply see how they are feeling, how life is treating them. Most just want someone to listen and hear them out without being judged. Life can be hard, and with the recent passing of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain, we are reminded that no matter how famous you are or how much money you have, you can still suffer from mental illness.  It is never too late to or too early to reach out to the friend you have been meaning to call or text, just go for it without expecting something in return.

The Lazy Effect

Lack of motivation can be the most frustrating thing in the world. You want to be productive yet your body is telling you to stay put. Your mind has ideas and plans it wants to accomplish, but the will to get it done just isn’t there. I too, struggle with this and I call it the Lazy Effect. I often wonder if it’s because I am lazy or my body is telling me to rest. I have days where I know I should be more productive than I am but also don’t make the effort to change anything about that. A big part of that comes from the trust I have within myself. Knowing that I can relax for a day or two without being productive and things will be fine lessens the stress I feel. However, it doesn’t stop the guilt. Being lazy is fun at times, yet you end up feeling terrible about yourself in the end. I wonder if we should try to do one productive thing a day or if it’s simply ok to just sit back and do nothing. Sure society makes us feel bad, but if being “lazy” is what’s best for the betterment of our mental stability, maybe we shouldn’t feel stressed after all.

It’s not Regret

Have you ever made a decision and then turned around and wished you never made that decision? Yes, I’m sure you have and we all have. Most people however, will refer to this as a regret. You regret the decision you just made because you are ashamed of what just happened or upset. But because you made that decision, you ended up learning more than you did if you never made it. It’s not regret you should feel, instead you should look into every thing as a learning experience. If you gained something from a decison and or choice in life, then that is an experience. A new experience you did not have before, and therefore you should be thankful. We spend so much time regretting things, and not looking at the value of what we are looking at as a regret. If you regret the fact that you didn’t study for that test, you learned something. Why? Now, you know what you need to do differently, and that is study! You learned something from that and hopefully have a chance to use it to your advantage. But, not harvesting regret starts with you and ends with you. If you want to see things differently, try seeing the positive instead of the negative.

Stop Suppressing Your Anger

Everyone has their trigger points. Things that make them happy, sad, and yes, angry. It is okay to have emotions and to let those emotions fuel you into doing something great or positive. But when you suppress your anger, you are slowly letting it control who you are and how you react to things that occur in your everyday life. Represssed anger can come from trauma or just stress. Regardless, this emotion shouldn’t make you feel like you are never good enough for anything. In order to stop suppressing your anger, you need to admit the problem at hand. If you solve your problems by simply not addressing them, then of course you can’t expect to get change. But if you own up to your anguished feelings, you can begin to expect different results in your life. If you feel as though suppressing your anger may be something you are going through, find a new way to channel that energy. For example, some people find comfort in exercising or screaming. Some like to talk things out or meditate. I find the best way to release the negative tension, is to breathe in and out until you feel lighter. Releasing tension can be the start of letting go. And once you let go, you can begin to restore.

Everything I’m not made me everything I am

I’m not an extrovert.

You don’t need to be

Life has a way of throwing extroverts at you and letting you feel as though that is your only option.

Be that or be nothing.

No.

Be you.

Be unapologetically you.

I know a lot of observers, they make the best visionaries.

They have the best personalities and no one will know. Why? Because I’m not loud or assertive enough for you?

But I’m here.

In all my glory. Standing so far out of this world you can’t even see because you are so far away. Not in the literal sense but in the mind. You’ve been poisoned to think introverts are weird, standoffish, stuck-up.

But you are so vain.

We aren’t even looking at you. We are looking through you.

We can sense your pain, your fake smile, your insecurities.

You want to be heard too but express it in the most obvious way.

That’s how most people are trained. To gravitate toward the loudest person in the room.

What if I told you that the loudest person isn’t always the most confident, the most secure, the most fearless. Would you not idolize them? Would you lead instead of follow? And would you be yourself. The self that introverts know all along. Some of us, we like to be alone, to spend time with ourselves. In return we develop a sense of awareness, so that by the time you even realize it we are miles ahead.

It’s okay, this isn’t meant to bash you or behoove you.

Extroverts are the plant. Introverts are the soil. Deeply overlooked, grossly undervalued, and never too much.

I don’t need to laugh or smile to show how happy I am. I am happy because I am me.

And Everything I’m not made me everything I am.