Recently, I watched a Ted Talk with Luvvi Ajayi called “Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.” It was not my intention to watch this Ted Talk, nor did I personally search for videos on this topic, but the title seemed interesting so I said, why not. After watching the Ted Talk, and listening to everything Luvvi Ajayi said, I could not believe how truthful her words were. What really spoke to me in the Ted Talk, was when Luvvie mentioned how she did not start living her “best life” until she started doing things that she feared. At that moment, I thought about everything that I am or was afraid of doing. I specifically thought about the moments when I had to do things that scared me and how much better I always felt doing those things. For example: Most people’s greatest fear is public speaking, but after you speak out in front of a group of people, you always feel better. Why is that? I thought. Then I remembered. It is because you are relieved. You were able to conquer the thing that you probably over-think, over-analyze, and the one thing that makes you super uncomfortable. Then I thought. What if I started to tackle everything that makes me uncomfortable? So, I made a list of the things that make me the most uncomfortable. This consisted of things like eye contact, eating alone, and traveling alone. Then I thought to myself, what if I did everything on this list and check it off one by one once it is completed. If I started to do what makes me uncomfortable, would it not be a discomfort anymore? That is what I will have to find out. I encourage you to do something that makes you uncomfortable. Document it, reflect on it, and see if it has impacted your life in a positive way.
Going natural and learning to love your natural hair texture can be a long process and no it does not happen overnight. It took me 3 years after my big chop to understand my natural hair and to become comfortable wearing it in all forms. I use my hair as a form of self-expression, yet when it is out in its natural way I started to feel less comfortable. I believe my lessened comfortability came from me not knowing how to take care of my hair. People will say “natural hair is so much work” and although I cannot disagree, it is also all about how you care for your hair. By caring for your hair better, i.e. moisturizing, deep conditioning, protective styling, low manipulation styles, you are helping your natural hair to grow, become healthier, and will enhance the way your hair looks to the eye. Once this happens, you can learn to love your curls. Try to focus on maintaining healthy hair first rather than length and you can begin to see what your hair likes and dislikes. This process is all about trial and error but once you learn what your hair likes, you can begin to like your hair as well. Aafterall, confidence comes from within, your hair just acts as your crown.