I always see posts on social media that say: Stop reaching out to people first and you’ll see who really cares about you. And while I believe that communication should be a two-way street, if it isn’t, it’s also not the end of the world. Most people who suffer, suffer in silence and that friend who always thinks about reaching out but never does, may be suffering and not want anyone to know or be looking for the right moment to tell you. Check in on your friends, not for a favor or to ask them to do something with you. Check in on them to simply see how they are feeling, how life is treating them. Most just want someone to listen and hear them out without being judged. Life can be hard, and with the recent passing of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain, we are reminded that no matter how famous you are or how much money you have, you can still suffer from mental illness. It is never too late to or too early to reach out to the friend you have been meaning to call or text, just go for it without expecting something in return.
We all go through life thinking their are not enough hours in the day. I feel that all too often during a time when I have the most time I may ever have again. Prioritizing what needs to be in your day can help in fixing the “not enough time” problem. I was once told that when you feel there isn’t enough time, you make time; You especially make time for things that are important. Whenever you feel like there may not be enough hours in your day, set a schedule. I often find that setting a schedule helps me stay balanced and completing what needs to be done. Waking up early and going to bed early are also things that help me stay most productive. The saying “the early bird catches the worm” works for those willing to catch the worm. So, what are you willing to do to allow more flexibility in your life? That, remains up to you.
Repeat after me.
I am worth it, I am enough, I am beautiful, I am unique, I am me.
How did that feel? I hope you felt a sense of relief after saying those words. Why? Because it is true. We often compare ourselves to others, whether the physical or the mental. We admire other attributes about a person and wish they were our own. When someone possesses something we want, we tend to get jealous and look for validation within our friends and family. When you compare yourself, you are denying your value. You are asking, am I beautiful like them? Am I intelligent like them? Am I charming like them? If I am not, what can I do to possess attributes like this person? So, instead of being who you are, you are now aspiring to be someone else, not even realizing that what makes that person who they are, is by being themselves and honing in on the strong characteristics they possess. Instead of comparing yourself, you should find what makes you unique. Everybody has unique characteristics about themselves. It may be the way you walk, or the way you talk, or your smile, or a certain talent or skill you have. I encourage you to dig deep this week, repeat the words above and do some soul searching. What makes us all unique is the fact that we are all different and although we may endure some of the same experiences, we are all our own person, and instead of trying to be like or wish to be like someone else, you should spend time with yourself. If that means you need to be alone for a day, or take a social media break; clear your mind and remind yourself that your qualities are lovable and enough because the only affirmation you need is from yourself.
We all have one life to live. Although it may sound cliché, why waste it pleasing others and not allowing yourself to be content? Granted, there are people who are happy by pleasing others and if that is your purpose, you should keep doing so. However, if you do not know what your purpose is, take time to yourself. Learn about you, what makes you smile the most? What do you get the most joy out of? If it’s a specific hobby, learn how you can leverage that. If it is an action, leverage that too. Anything that does not give you joy, try to eliminate that from your life. That could be a person or an activity. Most recently I took a year, to get to know myself, my likes and dislikes. Although I am still learning about myself, the greatest thing I learned over the course of that year was what makes me happy. I found that I was continuing to do things and insert myself in situations that gave me great stress. I was never actually enjoying myself but dreading the moment when I should have been creating memories. I challenge you to learn something new about yourself today. Take on a new hobby, if you don’t like it, try something else that you do like. Make yourself happy so that you can have inner peace.