Is that your real hair?
While sitting in the nail salon, one of the workers proceeded to ask my if my hair was real. I quickly said yes because 1. I felt it was not their business and 2. It is.
That’s when I got to thinking, over the years I’ve gotten that question many times. Over the years, I’ve noticed that mostly black women are approached with that question. It’s almost as if we cannot have long, thick, or full hair. When I thought about this, that is when I began to realize how offensive the question is. Then I wondered if that worker would have asked someone who wasn’t black the same? Would it have been more believable if it were someone else? And why? Why does it matter so much to other people if their hair is theirs or not. At the end of the day, the hair on someone’s head is theirs because they are wearing it and have paid for it. Asking black women if their hair is real gives off the perception that you don’t believe their hair can be real if it isn’t at a certain length or dimension. If you would not ask that same question to any one else in the room? Why ask me? Simply put, you wouldn’t because the perception was shock, that a black woman like me could have so much hair on their head. I left the salon feeling offended but also more aware of how often this happens to women especially black women on a daily basis. A Black women’s hair comes in all shapes, lengths and dimensions. To believe that a Black women can’t have long hair and more specifically a dark skin Black woman is ignorant. Maybe I should not blame him for the question. Maybe I should blame society for placing these perceptions into the heads of many. Furthermore, asking someone if their hair is real solves nothing if anything at all. Most answers result in a yes or a no. The hair we have on our heads should not be the definitive factor of believability. It point blank and period just should not be questioned.
Recently, I became a college graduate and like most, it was one of the most exciting moments of my life. However, unlike some college graduates, I did not graduate with a full time job offer, something many college graduates seek to obtain. I instead moved to New York City, searching in desperation for a job in New York. After not having any success, I decided it was time to refocus. Too much of one thing is never a good thing and I decided that I was spending too much of my time not doing what I enjoyed or what was a passion point for me. Instead of living my life I was watching others live theirs. I noticed I was not happy and the reason why was because I was watching everything around me and not focusing enough on myself. I decided it was time to refocus my energy on things that I love and one of those things is my blog. I stopped blogging because I wanted to take time to focus on myself, not realizing that blogging was helping me to focus on myself because it is what makes me happy. Refocusing on my goals has helped me to regain motivation and to feel better about myself and the future. Sometimes all it takes is reflection to get you back in the right spirit. Staying positive and focusing on things you enjoy can really turn stressful situations into refreshing outcomes.
Social Media. Trends. Validity.
What’s it all for?
I relinquish my time and my energy.
Two things that I need and can’t always get back
In the end, is this what makes me happy?
Comparing, Judging, and Watching
Telling myself to do more yet I don’t
This app is free but it comes with a fee
Validation precedes every thought
Funny thing is, this is what I was taught
Only problem is, no one is to blame but me
How could I give my control to something so draining?
It seems I have lost the battle to being online
But when I find myself I will have truly won
For now, I know what it means to be a lost one
Happy Skincare Sunday!
For women, Summer is a time when we try to cut back on wearing heavy makeup and let our skin breathe. This is partly due to the fact that it is hot and nobody wants to sweat through their foundation. Nonetheless, caring for your skin underneath that makeup is always just as important as the makeup itself. Here are some tips to give you that summer glow without doing or spending too much.
1. Moisturize-Although it is summer, it is still important to moisturize. Lightweight moisturizers are some of the best for the summer time due to the fact that the skin sweats and may over produce oils causing us to look more dewy than usual. Moisturizers like Cetaphil and Cerave are lightweight and will keep you glowing but not over oily. They retail for about $12-$15.
2. Essential Oils-Essential Oils are some of my favorite skin care products. As I have mentioned before, they do not have to be used only on the skin, but for this post they will. Oils like Rose Hip Seed, Lavender, Vitamin E, Almond Oil, and Jojoba Oil are great moisturizing oils that penetrate deep into the skin to give the skin a healthy glow. If you have oily skin, Rose Hip Seed and Jojoba are perfect as they are lightweight and non-comedogenic, meaning they will not break you out. Essential Oils can be found in your local Drugstore or Amazon.com for $6-$14.
3. Vitamin D-The sun produces vitamin D which can make the skin look super rich and glowing. Hence, when you stand in the sun to take a selfie, you notice your skin looks better. Getting Vitamin D from the sun can give your skin a healthy glow but always remember to protect the skin from the UV Rays by wearing a skin protectant such as sun screen.
4. Vitamin C-You can get vitamin c from actual vitamins yes, but using a vitamin C serum can brighten your skin and also treat dark spots by lightening them to return to your normal skin tone. It is best recommended to do serums before your moisturizer and to wear a sunscreen over the serum because it can be acidic and make your dark spots even darker.
Since post graduation I have been planning to move to NYC because their are better job opportunities for the field that I want to be in. NY is filled with different cultures and opportunities awaiting for people to make their impact. I am excited to start living in NY for good and look forward to making my mark in the Big Apple!